Jesi Haack On: How to Deal With A Trouble Guest
Thursday, December 31, 2009 at 5:13AM Tweet With 2009 coming to an end, we thought we'd give you a last laugh (for the year) with Jesi Haack. Keep in mind while you read, this is a true story and quite a doozy!
How to deal with a Trouble Guest:
For all of my clients I always ask them if there is a family situation I should be aware of. You know, just be on the look out for the uncle who drinks too much, or be sensitive to the mother who wants to feel included, or for the disgruntled guest who wasn’t really invited. Here is an interesting scenario:
Me: “Are there any sensitive situations you want me to be aware of?”
Sweet Bride: “Yes, my dad’s girlfriend is crazy. Everyone hates her and she isn’t invited, but she might come anyway.”
Me: “Wow, that sounds exciting.” (what else can you say? Come on!)
Sweet Bride: “We’ll see HOW exciting!”
Two weeks before the wedding, I receive this phone call:
Sweet Bride: “Hi Jesi, she’s coming. And my sister might not come now because she will be there.”
Now, fast forward to the wedding day. The bridal party is gathered in the ceremony ballroom getting ready for family pictures. My bride’s eyes widen, her jaw drops, she looks at me with panic in her eyes.
Sweet Bride: “She is wearing a white dress. She. Is. Wearing. A. White. Dress. SHE IS WEARING A WHITE DRESS!”
The crazy girlfriend walks in wearing a floor length, white gown with a plunging (understatement) neckline, covered in one million sequins. The final touch is the over-the-top white fur stole she has wrapped around her extremely orange body.
Me: “Don’t worry. She looks like a Be-dazzler on crack. You look elegant, beautiful, magical and stunning. Don’t think twice about it.”
Over the next 4 hours, this woman tried as hard as she could to turn the attention of the event on her. From standing up during the ceremony and walking out (down the center aisle), taking the mic from the DJ, hanging on the bride constantly, demanding the bouquet be tossed to her, AND stealing the photographer and demanding him to take seductive pictures of her on the cocktail patio lounge furniture. I have never seen anything like it.
How to handle this situation? Well, it helps to have a wedding planner on your side that is on the lookout for such shenanigans. I was pretty busy intercepting my Sweet Bride from Crazy Girlfriend. I would guide my bride away from her, claiming I needed her for a picture here or there. I communicated with the DJ from across the room using only intense eye movements. My assistant already had a cab waiting for her when she fell out of her chair because she was impaired.
More importantly, though, is how did Sweet Bride handle it? Perfectly. She was gracious. She was polite. She smiled. She had fun. She didn’t let Crazy Girlfriend win.
Sweet Bride had the time of her life. She had two choices: she could decide to let this woman completely ruin her wedding day, or she could ignore the selfish woman and completely ENJOY her family, friends, and wonderful new husband. She spent her evening greeting guests, smooching her hubby, singing karaoke, and dancing to “All the Single Ladies." Sweet Bride was impeccable. She was inspiring. She displayed that it isn’t about the dress, the décor, or the attention. It is about CHOOSING to love one person for the rest of your life.
So, know that you have a choice. You can choose to dwell on what goes wrong and contribute to the impending snowball effect that will certainly happen, OR you can choose to let those things add character to your story. Be gracious. Be kind. Be humble. Be yourself. And most importantly, be in LOVE.
Define your style.
Reader Comments (5)
Ohhh Jesi! You are so amazing! I love you and your hilarious writing! Have a fab new year!
thank you Heather and Kimberly!!! Loved this bride, BTW.
Youre so funny Jesi, I am horrified (yet amused) by this story! Lol, good for your bride.
Jesi, this post was wonderful. Definitely entertaining, but more than that a great example of how to approach tough situations. Love your (and your bride's) grace!
Oh my...this is horrible but entaining to read. You forget about the small details that can become huge details. I am getting married this year and maybe haven't thought through all the details. Thanks for reminding me how valuable a wedding planner can be to your event.